The Baptism

    


The winds have licked the flames from underneath me,
 sending me crashing towards the earth, 
free falling and tumbling sideways.  Oh Lord, shall I be baptized?

Just as gravity holds the Earth in place, there was nothing 
 inside of me that was the center of my universe.
 The object of my deepest affections shrunk the view of everything that surrounded her. 
The delusion was that time stood still, the reality however, was that I had stopped progressing.

Understand that all joy is no mystery. The discovery for you is the misery of another. 
The space between a smile and a frown, is a day. Gladness of heart is not a remedy for sorrow.
 It has no remedy. It mourns beneath your temporal joy and sleeps during moments of laughter. 

What can the heart give in exchange for its sorrow? To eyes, tears.
 To the lips, a quiver. When the heart dies the spirit mourns. This is sorrow. 
Oh Lord, shall I be baptized?

I fell backwards into you.
free-falling sideways into a destructive bliss
as the sky fell from before me and the ocean moved underneath

to receive this shell.

The weight of your presence added momentum to my fall.
any moment now and I shall be baptized.
Maybe in a lucid dream the world ends. 
The sea spins and clouds are chased away by air that's thin. Angel's sing "smile in your sleep.
Dance in your madness.
Cry in your joy. 
When morning dawns, misery begins".

We were an augmented melody with confusing lyrics.
you made me so damn dizzy, intoxicated.  

Unpredictable, laughter and tears.
Fingers pricked by thorns, blood on the petals.
I knew the risk, a flower never meant to be handled so foolishly.

You were my breath and I held you until I could breathe
no more. I died in you yet you could not live inside me.

I lick my lips tasting your last kiss a new.
Closed my tear stained eyes as the smell of the sea
danced under my nose. I whispered a prayer and 

as I stood on the cliff.   I fell.

The fall was exquisite, the anticipated crash will be beautiful.

God forgive, that I cannot forgive.
Forgive what is most unforgivable.

Receive what is left of me o great sea.
Wash my remains upon the shores of time,
bring with me my wayward footprints left in the sand.
One last look at the sun.  One last wish from my lips.

Fall unto me my salvation.

Falling faster still and then....
baptism. I

 was cleansed by the truth of you.  

The parable of us, 
"And when all is said of love and dreams, the dream it's self arouses from sleep.

The bliss we imagined for self will teach,
That nothing in life is truly pure or sweet". 

I have been baptized..